


Like Real People Do

by TwoHalvesSameSoul



Series: What Comes After [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Angst, Established Relationship, First Time, Hurt Jared, J2, M/M, Protective Jensen, RPF
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-05
Updated: 2015-01-09
Packaged: 2018-02-24 04:05:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2567576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwoHalvesSameSoul/pseuds/TwoHalvesSameSoul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared and Jensen decide to get away for the weekend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Road Trip

**Author's Note:**

> This story is fictional and was completely formed in the mind of the author.
> 
> Once again. Thank you Ladies.
> 
> And Babe...You know.

It seemed like a good idea at the time. A short, much needed road trip before the full weight of the insanity that was the beginning of the new season of Supernatural began. They'd pushed through the 7th episode in four days, both Jared and Jensen running on a high from enjoying the work being given to them for the first time in years.  
It was Jared who suggested that they take a road trip. He had tickets to a Seattle Seahawks game that Sunday and decided they needed some "daddy down time." Jensen agreed. With the new season’s filming schedule and moving his family to Austin, he needed some down time with his best friend. Male bonding time, beer, hot dogs, and football. It sounded like heaven. Jared even managed to talk Jensen into letting him drive. Which in hindsight was the first mistake.  
They left Vancouver Thursday afternoon. After finally making it through the Vancouver traffic, which Jared’s driving left Jensen hanging onto the door handle with one hand and the other with a death grip on his coffee cup, and waiting in line for an hour at the border, they finally hit an open road. Jensen let the lull of the road and the classic rock tunes spilling from the stereo wash over him and he closed his eyes. 

Jared looked over at his costar and best friend and smiled to himself at how relaxed he looked. It'd been a rough couple of years for them. One or both of them had thought about walking away from the show on more than one occasion. But they loved the show, the fans, and they couldn't give up on it. And they'd been rewarded with a new season and scripts that were reminiscent of the earlier seasons. And though neither one of them would admit it, the thought of not seeing each other every day for nine months of the year was hard to even think about. Yes, they lived a few blocks away now but there was something magical about being in Vancouver together, where it all started, doing what they love, and spending time with someone you...... Jared let the thought hang there. Sneaking a quick peek at his snoring passenger, he felt the warmth spread through his chest like it did whenever he allowed himself to bring down the carefully constructed walls that surrounded his true feelings for Jensen. He'd been in love with his on-screen brother for almost ten years. He'd only been fully aware of it for the last seven, though.  
Jared sighed and gripped the steering wheel tighter. He'd thought several times throughout the years that Jensen felt it too, but he'd never acted on it and Jared would be damned if he was going to risk losing Jensen over it. Jensen meant more to him than he would ever know. 

An hour outside of Seattle, when they had pulled over to stretch their legs and get more coffee, Jensen noticed the second mistake – their overnight bags hadn't made it into the truck. Luckily Seattle had plenty of places to get what they needed. Nothing that couldn't be replaced.  
After a quick trip to the closest strip mall, they decided to get some takeout and head to the hotel to watch some crap TV and decompress. Jared waited in the truck while Jensen went inside the hotel office to check them in. Jensen came out of the office with a perplexed look on his face. "Did you mean to book a room with a single bed, Jay? Because you did."

Jared stared back at Jensen with an expression that probably mirrored Jensen's. "No, why would I get a single?"

"I have no idea, but with everyone in town for the game there's no other rooms available."

"Shit man, I'm sorry. Get in, we can go find another one."

"Jay, there's not gonna be another one within 30 miles of the stadium. We can share a bed, Jared, I don't bite. It's not like we haven't done it before." Jensen climbed back into the truck, missing the smirk that briefly appeared on Jared's lips. Jensen turned his head to look out the window to hide the mischievous look that played on his face. 

After eating dinner at their tiny hotel table, Jared took off his shoes, plopped down on the bed, and grabbed the remote. 

"I'm gonna take a shower. Then we can find a shitty movie to watch," Jensen announced.

"Yeah sure," Jared mumbled.  
Jensen walked over to where they had dropped their new purchases. Jared was definitely not watching Jensen's famous bow legs walk away from him. And he really wasn't checking out his straight, married, best friend's ass as he bent over to grab his bag. Jensen stood up and turned to walk back toward the bathroom door and Jared prayed his face wasn't as red as it felt. 

By the time Jensen emerged from the bathroom, Jared had managed to regain his control. That control slipped completely when he turned to see Jensen standing there with beads of water dripping from his short spiky hair, running down his toned muscled shoulders and his newly chiseled, very visibly naked chest. Jared silently thanked and cursed Jensen and his dedication to becoming "Demon Dean." Over hiatus he had bulked up and toned his already pretty damn near perfect body, and it showed. Jensen cleared his throat and broke Jared out of his trance.  
Jared made his eyes move up to Jensen's, trying desperately to remember that his body needed oxygen, and to breathe. 

"I don't suppose you remembered to buy something to sleep in?" Jensen asked in an amused tone. 

"What?" Jared asked still trying to regain control of himself enough to use actual words. Jared noticed then that Jensen was standing there clad only in a black pair of boxer briefs. Fucking hell.... 

"Jared? Did you break into to my stash of whiskey while I was in the shower?"

"What? No! I..... Wait what was the question?”

Jensen laughed lightly and flung his wet towel at Jared. "I asked you if you remembered to buy some sweats or something to sleep in. It seems I forgot," Jensen asked again slowly. 

"Ummm... No, no I don't think I did."

There was a gleam in Jensen's eyes as he looked down at him, or was Jared imagining it?

"You wanna take a shower next or should I find us something to watch? I think I left some hot water," Jensen said, as he walked away to grab the whiskey out of his backpack. What Jared didn't see was the widening grin on Jensen's face when he turned away from Jared. If Jensen had any doubts about how his costar really felt about him, they were gone the moment he saw the look in Jared's eyes when he came out of the bathroom. It took all of Jensen’s questionable maturity not to make a comment about Jared and a cold shower. Jensen grabbed the whiskey and two glasses out of the bathroom, pouring one for Jared and one for himself. He handed the cup to Jared, who took it and downed it in two gulps. Jensen looked at Jared with a raised eyebrow. Playing the innocently amused card.  
Jensen poured more into Jared's glass and sipped his own, letting the warm liquid give him the patience and courage he was going to need to finally break Jared out of his shell. He sipped his whiskey until it was gone and poured himself another, casually climbing into bed sitting back up against the headboard, crossing his ankles together and grabbing the remote from Jared. 

"Jay? Shower or no?"

"Ummm no, I'm good man. Just find us something to watch." Jared composed himself, determined to hold onto his ever slipping self-control. Ignoring the half-naked Ackles next to him, Jared stood up with a purpose, wobbling a little on his whiskey legs, and took off his hoodie and t-shirt, throwing them aside, then unbuckling his belt, unbuttoning his jeans and letting them fall into a pile on the floor. And because he was concentrating so hard on not getting hard, he missed the glaze of desire in Jensen’s eyes as he watched Jared undress. 

Jensen felt his own body's response to Jared and shifted to allow for the growing hardness. Causally he moved a pillow to cover himself. Jensen watched as Jared climbed back into bed reclaiming his seat against the headboard. Jensen noticed Jared causally moving the comforter to cover his own body's betrayal to the situation.  
Jensen finally stopped on a movie they'd both seen. At this point neither one of them was paying a damn bit of attention to anything but the electricity that was sparking between them. Jensen decided that he needed to grab the whiskey bottle which just happened to be on Jared's side of the bed. Rather than making him move, Jensen reached over Jared to grab the bottle. The moment Jared felt Jensen's naked flesh on him, a hiss escaped his lips. And when Jensen accidentally lost his balance and fell onto Jared, covering him with his body, the moan that followed was inescapable. Jensen stayed where he was, his eyes searching out Jared's.  
Jared has his eyes closed, silently praying Jensen not only didn't hear that, but that he couldn't feel the now extremely hard evidence of his reaction to Jensen and his sinful body that no flimsy comforter was going to hide. 

"Jay.... Jay open your eyes and look at me." Jensen's soft tone got Jared's attention. Jensen's beautiful green eyes were inches from him. They were darker than normal, not that Jared studied his best friend’s eyes. "Jared? Come on man you're freaking me out here, use your words."

"Ummm...."

"Not technically a word but it'll do for now." Jensen shifted a bit, but didn't move. He had dropped the bottle of whiskey on the ground and placed his hands on either side of Jared's hips on the bed. He looked down and closed his eyes, steeling himself for what he was about to do. He was pretty sure he wasn’t about to lose his best friend in the entire world and the man that he was desperately in love with, but he wasn’t completely sure, and it scared the shit out of him. 

"Jay, I have a confession. And you have to promise that no matter what you don't freak out on me. Deal?"

Jared found his facilities enough to nod his head, his eyes never leaving Jensen's. 

"Okay. First, I probably should tell you that I may have purposely left the bags behind." Jensen waited for a reaction from Jared. When he got none, he decided it was safe to continue. "And there is a small possibility that when I checked us in I changed the room from a double to a single." Still no visible reaction from Jared, but Jensen heard what may have been a small sigh. He decided to take that as a good sign. “Okay Jay, I actually need you to say something other than 'ummm' for me now." Jensen stared into Jared's hazel eyes trying to gauge a reaction of any kind. Moments went by and Jensen was beginning to panic.  
Jensen began to slowly extract himself from his current position when he felt big strong hands grip his biceps. Jensen looked from the hands back up to Jared's eyes. What he saw there made his breath hitch. Jared's normally mosaic eyes were suddenly a deep obsidian. Jensen felt the hands around his biceps tighten. 

"Jensen,” Jared’s face was a mine field of emotions and fear crept inside Jensen as Jared’s questioning began. “Am I understanding this correctly? YOU purposely forgot our luggage?” 

Jensen nodded. 

“I’m going to assume then that you also purposely DIDN'T buy any sleepwear at the mall." Again Jensen nodded slightly. Jared had found his voice and was fighting for control of it as his emotions were currently a complete clusterfuck. 

"Yes, Jared, that's what I'm saying. Look I....." 

"No...It’s my turn to talk." Jared fixed a look at Jensen that sent shivers down the older man's spine.  
Jared took a deep breath and continued. “You’re also telling me that you purposely downgraded our room to a single bed?"

Jensen nodded slowly, afraid to speak.

Jared could feel his control slipping. He stared into Jensen's eyes and saw something there that he'd never noticed before. Want. Desire. Fear. Love?  
Before Jared could second guess himself, he grabbed Jensen and flipped him onto his back pinning his arms down, straddling him. He closed his eyes waiting for Jensen to try and buck him off, but there was no movement below him. Jared opened his eyes and looked down at his best friend. Jensen looked up at him, his pupils blown now to almost black, his breath coming out faster than before. Jared let his eyes wander down Jensen's body. He felt Jensen's body's response to its current situation. 

"How long?" Jared asked in a voice Jensen hadn't heard before. It was deep and raspy and sexy as fuck.

"Well I haven't measured lately but if I had to guess, about 10 inches give or take."

It took a minute for Jared to figure out what the hell Jensen was actually talking about. A small smile played on the older man's mouth. Those sinful lips were doing maddening things to Jared and making his patience wear thin. He wanted to smack that smile clean off that perfect face. 

"Jensen....how long have you wanted this, me....how long?" Jared asked again this time fixing Jensen with a look that dared him to crack another joke.

"Jesus Jared, I don't know the exact date."

"Ballpark it for me, Jensen. Days, months, years....What?"

"Years, Jared."

"How many?"

Jensen paused, not sure if there was a right answer. But he'd told himself that this was it, complete honesty, no matter the consequences. Jensen sighed and let the words flow fast and furious. It was too now or never. "Season two....the finale. Having to watch you lay in that bed, pretending to be dead...All I could think of was you, not Sam, you. My God Jared, what would I do if I lost you? How would I go on? By then I was so wrapped up in you that I felt like half of me was missing whenever you weren't around. I chalked it up to filming long hours, close quarters and all that. But in that moment, watching you there in that bed....I knew. What I felt went beyond anything I'd ever felt for anyone, ever. Scared the shit out of me to be honest. Not only was I falling in love with my costar, which is NEVER a good idea, but I've never....well I've never had those feelings for a man before, or since. Just you, Jay. So I did what any rationally thinking straight male from Texas would do in that situation, I bottled it all up and hid it. I couldn't risk losing you, damn my career, it was you I was terrified of losing. I needed you, need you, in my life. And sometimes it is so damn hard Jared....there were so many times throughout the years where I've wanted to.....tell you, show you, just...I couldn't. But life is short, Jay. And there's been moments where I've seen you looking at me, with a look....it's there and then it's gone, but I've seen it. And I needed to know. Moving to Austin, being that close to you....I need to know and I know you, you'd never make the first move, and I didn't want to....well I thought a little subterfuge was in order. But I can’t lose you Jared, so if this doesn’t feel in every way right to you too, then we can forget this ever happened. I need you, man. And I don’t know where to go from here."  
Jensen waited, watching it all sink in. He could see the information working its way into Jared's overactive brain. Jared's face was still a mask of controlled emotion. But the man was an actor, and a good one, so Jensen just waited patiently underneath his mostly naked costar until a plan of action was formed in the Padalecki Mind.  
Jensen didn't have to wait long. It was like a switch had been thrown, Jared suddenly coming alive with a burst of male aggression taking a hold of Jensen's wrists and pinning them above his head, flattening his body even closer to Jensen's and (probably) purposely adjusting his hips so that they thrust non too gently into Jensen's own still half-hard cock. Jensen let out a groan and his own hips reflexively thrust up looking for much needed friction. 

"Let me get this straight....," Jared started lowering his face closer to Jensen's. “You have been in love with me..."

"Well technically I didn't admit the love part..." Jensen cut off his smart ass response after reevaluating the look on the younger man's face. Jensen had seen that look before....where had he seen that look before...

"This is where you stop talking, Ackles. This is where you listen. If I want you to talk, I'll tell you to talk."  
Sweet mother of God....Jensen felt his dick twitch, apparently as excited as he was about Jared's new tone. Jared must have felt it too, because his eyes briefly left Jensen's to look down between their chests. A small, evil completely-Jared grin spread across his face. Jensen was in deep shit. Jared rolled his hips again. Jensen cursed underneath his breath.

"So, you've been in love with me for years....And instead of manning up about it, you decided to make me wait almost a decade? Is that the appropriate amount of time for this sort of revelation?"

"Hey! You could have nutted up too man, you're just as guilty as I am!" Jensen momentarily forgot that he was not to speak, but remembered quite suddenly when Padalecki hips ground back into his cock making the groan that escaped Jensen's mouth this time definitely not quiet. 

"I said, No....talking." And Jensen may have whimpered slightly at the tone and the look in Jared's eyes but he is fairly positive it was a very manly whimper. 

"Jensen, you are the most infuriatingly stubborn man....Of course I didn't tell you! I'm as Texan as you are you fucking asshole. Not only that, but I'm younger! As the older, wiser, and more experienced of the two of us, YOU should have been the one to.....Jesus, Jensen."

Jensen ached to grab Jared and pull him close, but Jared still had a vise-like grip on his wrists. He was going to have fun explaining the bruises to makeup on Monday. Jensen watched as Jared's mask of self-control began to crumble. Jared's breath was becoming more erratic. Jensen tensed up, preparing for the next verbal onslaught.  
Instead, Jared brought his lips down to Jensen's ear, barely skimming the flesh, sending goose bumps immediately over Jensen's bare flesh. Jared's hair fell across Jensen's face as he flicked his tongue out against the sensitive part of Jensen's ear. Jensen's hips rose up off the bed causing Jared to press his body down more firmly, trapping Jensen's body beneath his.

"Hold on. I’ve never done this before and you know me, Jen, I like to be very careful and slow and thorough when doing anything for the first time." Jared whispered into Jensen's ear. 

"Hold onto what? And… how slow?" Jensen asked in a broken moan. Jensen felt Jared laugh.

"If I have to tell you what to hold onto man, we're going to be here all night. And what I do to you, well that’s going to be my choice, Ackles."

"For fucks sake, Jared." Jensen said in a voice that could only be described as sex and whiskey. Jared pulled back from torturing Jensen's ear and looked at Jensen. For the first time letting all the walls down. Letting Jensen see what he felt, all of it. 

Jensen smiled up at Jared, "Me too, Jay."

Jared took a shaky breath and leaned down, letting his lips touch Jensen's softly, then taking that sinfully sexy lip in his mouth and sucking on it gently at first, then biting it gently. For the first time Jensen fought against Jared's grip on his wrists. He needed to touch Jared. 

"Jay...Please..," Jensen moaned into Jared's mouth, "I need my damn hands."

Jared smiled into Jensen's lips, “No. You had your chance Ackles. It's my turn....my rules.”

"Jesus, Jared." Jensen lifted his head up and took Jared's mouth. He was rewarded with a low rumble of a moan from Jared. Jared opened his mouth fully to Jensen. Jensen seized the opportunity and licked into Jared's mouth, grabbing his tongue and sucking on it. Jared responded with a whimper and his hips started a steady rhythm grinding into Jensen's painfully hard dick. "Fuck...Jay, let me...." Jensen pleaded again into Jared's mouth.  
Jared answered him by letting his free hand wander down Jensen's body. The fact that he was able to touch him, feel him, taste him... It was enough to make Jared almost come. He pulled back to look into Jensen's eyes.

"Jay? What.... What's wrong? We can...we can stop if you don't want to..." 

Jared smiled down at Jensen with that smile that was purely for Jensen. "Jen, I've wanted this for so long... It's just, it's..." Jared closed his eyes and turned his head away from Jensen hiding his face in the crook of his arm. 

"Hey, Jared... Look at me." Jared turned his head back to look back into the jade green eyes of his best friend. "Jay, I want this. I want you. And believe me when I say, you're the only man for me." Jensen smiled shyly up at Jared. 

Jared gazed at the perfect man beneath him, a wicked smiled slowly forming. 

"I know that look, Jared. That's the look you get right before we do something stupid that usually gets us caught."

“Stupid, no. It’s just, is it weird that this is not weird? I mean it should be a little weird right? It makes it weird that it’s not weird, and I…” Jensen moved his hips as hard has he could up into Jared’s cock, abruptly ending Jared’s train of thought and focusing his attentions back on the present situation.

“Padelecki….stop over-thinking things. It’s you and me, that’s why it feels right. It’s us. And I do love you, am in love with you, Jay. And that’s the least weird thing I’ve ever said.”

Jared could feel tears threatening to spill from his eyes and blinked them away quickly. He could see the same moisture forming in his best friend’s eyes. This was real, and it was them. Jared released both of Jensen's wrists and brought both his hands down, cupping Jensen's face. Now that he could look without hiding, he marveled at the myriad of greens that fleck all over Jensen's eyes. He took in all splashes of freckles, from his cheeks, down his shoulders to his chest. Even his hands were freckled and Jared loved every single one. He brought their mouths together again, and it was so NOT weird.

“I loved you first, Jen.” 

His hands now freed, Jensen reached up and ran his fingers through Jared's hair. Jensen gave him shit about how long his hair is whenever possible, but he secretly loved how it looks on him. It’s Jared. Jared pulled Jensen's face closer to his. He kissed him again. This would never get old. Slowly, deeply, letting all he'd held back come out through this one point of contact.  
Jensen felt the change. The kiss held a promise, a future and a past. It spoke of missed chances. It held promises of more, a future for the both of them. Jensen felt the beat of Jared’s heart and how it almost perfectly mirrored the beat of his own. Suddenly, Jensen needed more and the kisses became needy and messy. Teeth clanging together as Jensen fully explored Jared's mouth. Jared finally broke the kiss, both men breathless. 

“Jensen?”

“Yes.”  
That was all that needed to be said between them. Jensen let his hands run down the base of Jared’s neck and follow the curves of muscles along his back. He finally allowed himself to feel the pleasure without guilt upon touching Jared.  
Jared ducked his head into Jensen’s shoulder. He let himself take in the scents of Jensen, leather, wintergreen gum, sandalwood…Home.  
Jensen tightened his grip on Jared, pulling him in closer. It suddenly seemed very important that they be as close to each other as possible. The connection that they’d always shared taking on a heightened level of physicality.  
Jared moved his mouth to the base of Jensen’s throat and sucked on it lightly. Experimenting. He moved and positioned himself back over top of Jensen once more. Both of his hands free to touch. He ran his hand down Jensen’s chest, stopping to play with his nipples. Pinching them then running his thumb lightly over peak. He gave Jensen one more glance, checking to make sure this was still okay. Jensen’s look was of pure want and desire. Jared moved his mouth to replace his thumb. He took the nipple in his mouth and bit on it, then licked and sucked until he could feel Jensen squirming below him.  
Jared’s hand slid lower to the waistband of Jensen’s tight black boxers. He tugged at the waistband, moving it down enough to free Jensen’s cock. The moan from Jensen left no doubt in Jared’s mind what to do next.  
Leaning up and moving off of Jensen, Jared grabbed the top of his best friend’s boxers and slowly pulled them down, Jensen lifting his hips to help and hurry the process. The last article of clothing now removed, Jared finally got to take in his lover’s body in its naked glory. Jared may or may not have actually been drooling but his heart was beating so fast at that point that he was having trouble concentrating on much of anything. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, Jensen….you’re….”

“Having trouble with your words again, Jay?” 

The sinful look on Jensen’s face made Jared’s cock twitch. Jared took in the man before him, and for the first time he could remember, he was at a loss for words. He decided that he could use his mouth for other things and still make sure that Jensen knew exactly what he thought of his long, hard body. For the first time Jared understood what true desire felt like.  
Jared straddled Jensen, letting his huge hands move up and down Jensen’s chest, memorizing the feel of his skin and the muscles beneath. Jensen had his bottom lip trapped in his teeth, trying hard not to move but wanting to take control. He knew, however, how important this was for them both. Jared needed this time. Jensen couldn’t wait until it was his turn.  
The younger man moved to lay down, once again, half on and half off Jensen. He began slowly licking and biting down the older man’s chest. The pace was slow and meticulous. Jared slowly licked down the curve of Jensen's hip, sucking and biting at the soft, warm flesh. He moved down the right side and moved to the left, paying equal attention to it. Jensen's breath was coming out in short, hard sobs. Jared moved down slightly and blew a puff of warm air onto the tip of Jensen's cock. 

"Jared....." Jensen's voice came out in a small whimper. 

"Now would be the time to hold on to something, Jen." Jared took a deep breath, his hand lightly wrapping around the base of Jensen's cock. As soon as Jensen felt the warm touch, his hands both flung to the side of him grabbing onto the sheets, his eyes closed and his breathing became hollow and dense. 

"Jensen, open your eyes and look at me." Jared's voice was raspy and filled with something entirely new to Jensen's ears. Jensen opened his eyes slowly and looked down into the eyes of his partner. Jared held his stare as he opened his mouth and took the tip of Jensen's cock into his mouth, using his tongue to flick the sensitive underside while sucking lightly on the head. Jensen's whole body shivered and all the blood seemed to rush down into that one area of his body. He watched Jared's eyes as he sucked a little harder, taking a little more of the shaft in his mouth. 

"Jesus fucking Christ Jay..." Jensen's voice was barely there. His fists gripped the sheets tighter as he fought to not buck up into Jared's mouth and not to come right then and there.  
Jared took that as a good sign and opened his mouth up wider, sucking and licking Jensen's cock while using his other hand to pull and twist at the base. Jared's own erection was painfully still trapped in his boxers. The sounds coming from the Jensen were making him even harder.  
Jared slowed down and pulled back off of Jensen’s cock. He knew neither one of them was going to last much longer but he wanted a few more minutes. He ran his tongue from the base of his lover’s cock slowly to the tip, opened up his mouth and took the length of Jensen’s cock as deeply as he could then pulled off. He sucked lightly, using his tongue again to run it along the slit. He took his tongue and licked up the precome that was leaking from the tip, tasting it for the first time. It was salty and sweet at the same time and Jared found the taste completely Jensen.  
The noises coming from Jensen began to register in Jared’s brain again. Sweat was dripping from Jensen, his face was flushed with need and the strain it was taking for him to hold back. He was used to being the one in control and right now he was ready to lose his. 

“Jared….Please...” 

“Are you begging me, Ackles?”

Jared took his tongue and laid it flat against the slit of Jensen’s cock again, licking the precome out as leaked out. Sucking a little harder on the tip, using his hand to help with the flow of the motion. 

“FUCK….Jared!” 

Jared opened his mouth and flattened his tongue and took Jensen in his mouth, sucking and licking and tasting all of him. Jensen began thrusting his hips up, unable to control it anymore. He needed more and Jared gave it to him. Jared opened up his mouth and relaxed his throat taking Jensen’s cock all the way to the base. Jensen’s body tensed up and his breath left his body at the same time as he tried to scream. Jared’s pace increased and his own orgasm was just out of reach. He moved his arm that was trying to hold Jensen down and released his own cock from its entrapment. He moaned on Jensen’s cock in relief, sending vibrations up and down the shaft. 

“Jared…Fuck stop…Jared, dammit I can’t, I need to…” Jensen released his death grip on the sheets and tried to pull Jared off his cock before he came. Jared pushed his hands away and gave Jensen a look of pure sexed-out bliss. Jared increased his speed and his tongue started doing something witchy to Jensen’s cock, sending white hot pulses up and down Jensen’s spine. Jared moaned again, feeling himself coming undone. He hummed lightly onto Jensen’s cock and Jensen finally comes, screaming Jared’s name. His entire body feeling like it was hit with an electric current, he saw white lights behind his eyes as the orgasm ripped through him. 

Jared can feel the come shooting down his throat and hears Jensen screaming his name as he comes and that’s all it takes. He moves his cock against the sheets using that for a little friction. And Jared has the best orgasm of his life, coming untouched. 

A few minutes later, Jensen regained consciousness and opened his eyes to see a smiling Padalecki looking back at him. Jared had covered them up under the blanket after taking off his own messy boxers and using that to clean them both off. Now Jared lay on his side facing Jensen, Jensen lying on his back. Jensen turned to face Jared and they stared at each other for a few moments. Content. Neither man willing to break the spell. Finally, Jensen turned his back to Jared and lay on his other side. 

“I need a nap,” Jared sighs and closes his eyes. 

“Jay, get your ass over here and spoon me.”

Jared laughs, “Does this make you the bottom?”

“Guess we’ll find out when we wake up, and then it’s my turn.”


	2. Losing Control

Jensen sat in the hard chair meant for someone about six inches shorter and leaned his head up against the wall. He closed his eyes and tried desperately to block out the chatter from the strangers around him and focus on remaining calm. They'd already threatened to throw him out once. Thank God Clif had stepped in and calmed things down. It would have taken a small army and a tranquilizer gun to get him any further away from Jared than he was now. Jared....he needed to get back there. He needed someone to tell him what the fuck was going on or there was a decent chance he was going to start throwing punches. Channeling Dean Winchester right now was probably counterproductive. Fuck.

Jensen hadn't been there when it happened. He'd finished shooting early and had planned on staying behind with Jared until he was done shooting. They had planned their first long weekend together since Seattle and they were both excited and nervous. That weekend in Seattle had broken down those carefully constructed walls of self-preservation and denial both men had spent almost 10 years building. They never made it to the football game they'd had tickets for and instead watched it curled up on the bed, drinking beer, and making out like horny teenagers. Jensen couldn't get enough of kissing Jared. And even though all they did that weekend was make out, exchange a few hand jobs and some fantastic blow jobs, it had been enough for both of them. This whole guy-sex thing was new to both of them and they wanted to take it slow. So they waited for the perfect chance to get away, each losing patience a little over the past couple of weeks. Finally, the opportunity presented itself. His wife was taking JJ to see her parents and Gen was taking the boys to visit relatives on the east coast. Jensen had jumped on the chance to stay in Vancouver with Jared. They had planned to spend the weekend holed up at Jensen's place. Dani hated Vancouver this time of year so the chance of her coming for a surprise visit was nonexistent.

Jensen was hanging out in his trailer, not able to sit still or relax, when Clif came in to say the lighting rig had to be reset and Jared sent him to make Jensen go home and order pizza. After a quick text to Jared asking if he was sure, Jensen relented and let Clif drive him home then go back to wait for Jared. Jensen wasn't sure how much their bodyguard had picked up over the last few weeks, but as much time as he had spent with them over the years, Jensen was pretty sure he knew something was going on.

Jensen had been home for an hour when he got the call from Clif.

"Jensen, something happened on set. I wasn't there, I didn't see it. I don't know how bad it is. Stay there, I'm five minutes away."

Jensen was waiting at the curb when Clif pulled up. He didn't say anything in the car on the way to the hospital. He didn't trust his voice.

Once he got there, that's when his voice returned and so did the protective Texan whose best friend and lover was being kept from him. It was a blur now, but Jensen clearly remembered Clif stepping between him and a security guard that he’d pinned up against a wall. Clif finally pulled him off the guy just as members of the crew began to filter in.

From what he could gather, the stunt that Jared had stayed behind to shoot had gone terribly wrong. Jared had lost weight and muscle after his shoulder injury. Any asshat could see that. The rigging they'd set up had been tested ahead of time by Jared's stunt double, Mike, and had gone perfectly. However, the guy filling in for their regular stunt coordinator, Lou, didn't take into account the fact that Mike hadn't lost weight, and the calculations weren't adjusted. And because they were all looking forward to the long weekend, no one gave it a second thought when they strapped Jared into the rigging that was set to throw him back into a false wall made of foam padding. Too late, the director noticed what was happening. Jared was flung backwards and instead of hitting the foam, he'd hit the solid wood frame of the wall. By the time the crew reached him, Jared had stopped breathing. The set medics had done CPR and gotten him breathing again by the time the ambulance got there.   
The stunt coordinator had followed the ambulance to the hospital to check on Jared, but Jensen had been the first one to see him come through the emergency room doors. Unfortunately, no one had been quick enough to stop him before he threw a couple of well placed punches and tossed the guy into the vending machines. Clif pulled Jensen off the guy and took him outside to cool off. The stunt coordinator had left shortly after with a large bandage on his nose, a few bruised ribs, and a broken wrist. Jensen didn't give a fuck. He wished Clif had let him go, but then he probably would have been permanently banned from the hospital, and possibly in jail for attempted murder.

Since then Jensen had been sitting, quietly, in the chairs from hell with a watchful Clif keeping him in his line of sight.

That was half an hour ago.

Jensen was about ready to go a second round with the admin nurse when he heard his name.

"Mr. Ackles?" Great, Jared's doctor looked like fucking Doogie Howser.

"Yeah," Jensen answered, rising from the chair to his full height. At this point a little intimidation couldn't hurt. And the doc was all of 5'6, maybe.

"Mr. Ackles, I'm Doctor Song. I'm the attending physician for Mr. Paddelah...Pada..."

"Padalecki. Jared. How is he?"

"He's breathing. However, he still hasn't regained consciousness. Mr. Ackles, Jared's wife and the studio's lawyers have informed me that you are to be in charge of medical decisions until Mrs. Padalecki is here."

Shit. Jensen should have been the one to call Gen. He hadn't even thought.... Shit. He'd call her as soon as he was done with Doogie and had seen Jared. He should probably call his parents and Dani too.

"Mr. Ackles? Should we sit?" Dr. Song started leading them back over to the chairs. Jensen held out a hand and stopped him.

"Doctor, no. I've been sitting for hours. I need to know what's going on. I need to see him. Doc, he's my...he's my best friend. Just tell me, please. And call me Jensen."

"Well, Jensen, Mr. Padalecki went into cardiac arrest while in transport. The EMTs got his heart started again and when he arrived his heart rate was normal. While doing our initial evaluation, he crashed again. We managed to get his heart going again after a couple of minutes. What took so long was getting him stabilized enough to send him for a CT scan."

Jensen closed his eyes and tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill out. He knew enough about this medical jargon to know that none of this was good. He couldn't lose it now. He opened his eyes when he noticed the doctor had stopped talking. He was looking at Jensen with patience and understanding. Jensen took a deep breath and tried to keep the terror he was feeling off of his face.

"Sorry doctor, go ahead," Jensen whispered.

"Basically Jensen, Mr. Padalecki's brain was bruised, and because of the bruising, it's swelling. Now we think we can control the swelling and we've ruled out any internal bleeding, but he has four broken ribs, several small lacerations, and a few bigger ones that we had to close using stitches. His back is severely bruised. He has a broken tailbone and several deep bruises on his arms. Our main concerns are the swelling of his brain and the broken ribs. Right now he has no internal bleeding and his lungs are not injured. But if he moves around too much or wakes up confused and tries to fight us, one of those ribs could puncture a lung. What I would suggest is putting him into a medically induced coma. That will help with both the brain trauma and the ribs. It will give him time to heal comfortably for a few days. Then we will slowly bring him out of it and reevaluate him. There are risks with this of course. If you'd like I can go over those with you before you decide."

Jensen knew it was his turn to talk, but all he could hear was the blood pumping in his ears. Jesus.... Jared.

"Decide... Decide what?" Jensen finally croaked out.

"Jensen, I need your okay to put Mr. Padalecki into a medically induced coma."

"Jared."

"I'm sorry?" The doctor looked at Jensen with genuine confusion.

"His name is Jared. Will he... With the brain... Brain trauma.. Is he... Will he...."

"Jensen, we won't know the extent of the damage, or if there is any, until he wakes up. I'm sorry, I can't promise you anything at this point. I wish I could."

"Do it."

"Okay, I'll have the nurse bring you the forms."

"Doctor, I need to see him." Jensen tried to keep the fear out of his voice, but he knew it was there.

"Jensen, Jared is pretty beat up. He's hooked up to machines, there are wires...are you sure you want to see him like that?"

"Yes." Jensen didn't even have to think about it. He couldn't give a rat’s ass what Jared was hooked up to or how badly he looked. He was still his Jared and he needed to touch him. He needed to feel the warmth of his skin and he needed to feel Jared's heartbeat for himself.

The nurse brought Jensen some forms to sign and then the doctor led him to Jared’s room.

"I'll give you a few minutes, but we need to start the procedure soon."

"Thank you, Dr. Song."

Jensen paused before opening the door. He needed a moment to try to prepare himself. Awake or not, Jensen needed to be strong for Jared. Then he opened the door. 

Jensen's heart dropped. Jesus....

Jared was covered in a white hospital blanket, his hands at his side. His arms and chest had wires coming off of them, the other ends attached to about a dozen different machines. Jensen made his feet move closer. He was grateful there was a chair near the bed. His legs were doing a shitty job of holding him up. Moving the chair next to the bed, Jensen sat down and took in the broken man in front of him.

"Jay..." Jensen was amazed at how small his 6'4" best friend looked right now. He could hear the machine beeping out the steady beat of Jared's heart. He moved a stray piece of hair off Jared's forehead and gently ran a finger along his cheek feeling the warmth of his skin. He could see a few bruises blooming around the backs of his arms, but for the most part that was all he could see of Jared's physical injuries. He knew that Jared's back would be a different story. He wasn't prepared for that yet, even if he could see it. He could see Jared's chest rise and fall. He sat for a few moments just watching, not sure what to do or say. Could he hear him? Jensen read somewhere that patients in a coma could sometimes hear people.

"Jared. Jay...I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I should have been there. If I had been..." Jensen's voice caught and he had to stop for a moment. Swallowing past the lump in his throat, He tried again.

"Jared, man, I need...I need you to come back. I need to see those beautiful hazel eyes. I need you to keep me sane. I need to see that smile, the special one, the one you say is just for me. God dammit, I need the dimples. And the puppy dog eyes that get you whatever you want. I need to hear your voice, Jay. I need you to tell me when I'm being an ass. I need you to keep me from killing Misha. I need your candy wrappers all over my trailer and I need to trip over your big ass boots when you leave them lying around. I need your laugh, Jay. I can't... I can't do this without you. You're the best parts of me. You... You've made the last ten years the best times of my life. Next to my daughter, you're it man and I can't.... I can't do this alone. I don't want to. We have so many things we haven't done yet, Jay. So many...so many places we haven't gone. I.... I need you and I love you. I love you so much, Jay. Come back to me. Please come back to me, baby. Please....."

Jensen barely registered another presence in the room, but when he looked up Dr. Song was standing there with a couple of nurses and another doctor.

"Jensen, it's time. We need you to leave the room while we do this. Then we'll move him to his own room and you can come back and sit with him, I promise."

Jensen nodded slightly and stood up, looking down at his heart, lying in a bed, broken.

"I'll be right outside, Jay."

Jensen turned to go and then stopped. He leaned down and kissed Jared softly on the lips, then whispered in his ear, "I love you, Padalecki. Always."

Jensen made it outside of the room before he lost it. He leaned against the wall and slowly slid down until he was sitting. He put his head on his knees and finally allowed the tears to fall.


	3. Funeral

"Jensen, he's not going to care what tie you've got on. Only that you're there," Dani said, coming up behind him, brushing imaginary lint off the sleeves of his suit jacket. "Come on, Gen and the kids are waiting downstairs and the car's here."

Jensen stood for another minute looking at his reflection in his mirror. It didn't look right without Jared there next to him. He had no idea how he was going to make it through a day full of friends and relatives who meant well, but had no idea what Jensen was really feeling. The ache that he felt without his best friend next to him was acute and ever-present. Dani had been great, as usual. Very patient and understanding. They'd had a long talk after the accident when Jensen had refused to leave Jared. There were plenty of angry telephone calls and accusations thrown around. It wasn't until Dani came to Vancouver with JJ that Jensen had left to see his daughter. He had missed her, missed them both. And whether or not he knew it at the time, he'd needed the distraction. It was that night that he came clean to Dani. He told her everything. He cried and drank and she listened. And when it was all out on the table, she held him until he couldn't cry anymore.

Jensen should have known that both she and Gen had already figured out what Jared and Jensen hadn't figured out themselves years ago. The three of them talked. He knew that now that the whole truth had been spoken aloud that both women were hurting. But they had all agreed that honesty was best and they would figure everything else out, when Jared woke up. 

Gen and Jensen set up a rotating schedule; one of them was always with Jared. Even though Dani hated Vancouver, she agreed to stay up there with JJ so Jensen wouldn't feel torn. Filming had stopped. No one knew when they'd start up again, but they all knew that Jensen wasn't stepping foot on that set again without Jared. Cast and crew had been to the hospital. The room had been filled with cards and candy. The hospital staff had given up trying to enforce the visitor’s policy and had a bed placed in Jared's room for whoever had the night shift. Jensen read, sometimes to himself, but if there was a particularly interesting bit he'd read it to Jared. Dr. Song came and went, always saying the same thing. "No changes, yet." 

Jensen shook himself out of the memories that were haunting him and walked downstairs to join his family. He'd need them today. All of them. He had been trying to keep himself together, for the kids, for Dani and Gen. But today, today would test those walls. He just needed to hold it in for a few hours. 

The funeral seemed to last forever. Jensen kept his jaw firmly set and held onto Dani's hand so tightly that she actually had to whisper to him that she was losing circulation. He focused on the flowers, the pictures on easels that adorned the pulpit area, the words of the speakers, anywhere but on the coffin itself. He had been asked if he wanted to say a few words but had declined. He had a hard time speaking to groups, unless Jared was next to him, and he knew there was no way he'd make it through a speech today. 

Following the funeral was a potluck at Jensen's house. People Jensen had never met before came to give their condolences. Jensen acknowledged them politely, but his heart was somewhere else, with someone else. 

After about an hour Jensen made a discreet exit, noticed only by Dani and Gen, who nodded at him as he walked up the stairs to his bedroom. He needed to go home. And right now, this house, this town, felt the furthest thing from home. 

He closed the bedroom door and shucked out of his suit, leaving it in a pile on the bed. He changed into his favorite jeans and a t-shirt he'd borrowed from Jared months ago. It seemed like a lifetime ago. He put on his Chucks and grabbed a beanie and a jacket. He'd packed his bag before the funeral knowing that he couldn't stay here any longer than he had to.

Grabbing his phone, he hit a familiar number. "Hey, I'm ready. My flight is in an hour." 

"On my way," Clif answered, and hung up. Jensen knew Clif had been waiting for the call and was probably sitting a few blocks away. 

Jensen sent off a quick text to Dani letting her know he was leaving and walked down the back stairs and out the back door. By the time he was at the curb, Clif had pulled up in his black SUV. Jensen threw his bag in the back seat and climbed in the front. Clif sent him a worried look over his sunglasses before pulling away. 

"Hey man, you okay?" Clif was concerned with good reason. Seeing Jensen like this was breaking his heart. He knew how connected the boys were, anyone with eyes could see that, but seeing Jensen without Jared was like looking at half a person. Jensen was slowly fading away and the only person who could fix that was Jared. 

"Yeah, Clif I'm fine. I just need to get home." 

Clif sighed and prayed that the flight was on time and that there would be no issues. Jensen couldn't handle that today. 

Luck was on their side though, and they were back in Vancouver by dinner. Clif would have suggested stopping for a quick bite, but he knew Jensen would say no, so he'd called ahead while they were waiting for the car and had some food sent to the house. 

They pulled into the driveway and before the car had come to a full stop, Jensen was jumping out. He grabbed his bags. Clif cut the engine and sighed as he watched Jensen climb the stairs two at a time to the front door. Clif decided to wait in the car for the food delivery. Jensen would want some alone time, and truth be told, so did he.

Jensen walked in and threw his bags down. He sent a quick text to Dani telling her he'd call her in a bit to say goodnight to JJ. Taking a deep breath, Jensen closed his eyes and let the familiar scent and feel of home soak in. He looked at the stack of mail on the hallway table as he threw his keys in the dish. He could hear voices from the TV coming from the living room. He decided he couldn't handle small talk right now and headed straight up to his bedroom. 

Jensen opened the door slowly and walked in, needing a nice hot shower, a glass or two of whiskey, and his bed. Not bothering to turn on the lights he headed straight to the bathroom. 

"I'm awake baby, you don't have to tiptoe," Jared's voice whispered into the darkness 

Jensen let out quick laugh and turned on the lights. Jensen felt his heartbeat finally return to normal and every muscle in his body visibly relaxed. He smiled down at the love of his life, who was propped up in bed with his laptop open. The funeral had really fucked Jensen up. The whole time all he could think about was how close he'd come to that funeral being for Jared and not his great uncle. Jensen had fought going. Being away from Jared right now terrified him. He'd almost lost him so many times...he couldn't lose Jared. 

Jared could see the emotions playing on Jensen's face and his face softened. He closed the laptop and put in on the nightstand. Jared's heart hurt for the pain and fear he could see in Jensen's eyes. He didn't know everything that had happened while he was in the hospital, and Jensen couldn't talk about it. But Jared had heard enough from Gen and Dani to know that Jensen was a mess. Jared had a good idea about how bad it had been for Jensen because if the situation had been reversed.... 

"Did you say hi to my babysitter?" Jared asked sarcastically. 

"No, not really in the mood for Misha's randomness today." 

"Don't blame you. I missed you, Jen. Come here." Jared scooted over on the bed to make room for his other half. Jared hadn't done well without Jensen either. He knew Jensen was still hurting, still scared that Jared would somehow end up back in the hospital, hooked up to machines. Jared hadn't slept well since Jensen left and it wasn't because of the pain that still plagued him. 

Jensen sat down and Jared immediately pulled him into a hug, burying his face in Jensen's neck, relishing the familiar scent of his lover. His arms tightened around Jensen and he closed his eyes to hold back the tears that threatened. 

"Jay, careful! You're gonna hurt yourself!" Jensen mumbled into his best friend’s shoulder, his hands rubbing up and down Jared's back carefully. He knew it was still sore and tender. But he needed to touch, he needed to know he was really there. 

"Shut up, Jen. Just let me hold you," Jared whispered. 

They sat like that for a few long minutes, neither wanting to break the embrace. Finally, Jensen pulled away enough to look into those beautiful hazel eyes. He took his hand and cupped Jared's face. Jared let himself drown in the mossy green of his lover's eyes. 

"Jared, I love you, I love you so much and if you ever try to leave me again I swear..."

"Hey, hey Jen. Stop. Babe, I'm fine, I'm right here, and I'm never leaving you. You're stuck with me, for life."

Jensen let the tears fall as he leaned in and planted soft kisses all over Jared's lips. 

Jared pulled away just enough to whisper, "I love you too, Jensen."

Jared leaned in to suck on those sinfully full lips when a loud voice broke their sanctuary.

"Hey! Clif ordered Chinese! Get your overgrown asses outta that bed and get down here and eat!" Misha yelled. 

Jared laughed at Jensen's facial expression and moved to get out of bed. "Help me downstairs my big, strong, sexy man?" 

Jensen blew out a breath and moved to get the crutches. "I'm only carrying your sexy ass down the stairs, then you're on your own big boy. The man of the house is home and you're gonna get those legs working again if it kills us both." 

"You are SO sexy when you're bossy, Ackles. Just wait until you get your proper ‘welcome home’ present." Jared smiled devilishly. Jensen’s heart skipped a beat and he smiled back down at his love. The thought of what that present could entail had parts of Jensen’s body paying all kinds of attention and, god, did he want to. But Jensen also knew what the Doctor Song had said, and that filled him with a deep, soul piercing fear. 

“I can see you thinking behind those beautiful green eyes, you know. Stop, Jen. I’ve been cleared to work with the modifications that writer’s have done to Sam. I’m home. You’re home. Stop thinking about the ‘what ifs’. We’ve been beating odds for over a decade. Now kiss me and get me out of this fucking bed. Misha was a horrible babysitter. I don’t know what you said to him before you left but he was like a fucking prison warden. And I’m hungry.” Jared whined. 

"I still think work can wait a few more weeks but if you’re sure then I’ll support that. As for Misha, I told him that if anything happened to you while I was gone, they’d never find his body. Now, move your ass, Padalecki, before Misha eats all the fucking dumplings and finds the good beer."


End file.
